Hey Guru,
I am 25 year old woman living in Delhi. I have been raped by my dads friend over and over for almost two months when i was 15 while staying at his house during vacations.
Now i have a boyfriend for the last 6 months and i cannot get intimate with him. The very idea of a man touching me makes me anxious. I am scared that i might never enjoy physical relationships ever in my life again because of that beast. How do i tell this to my boyfriend. He never has forced me till date and is very caring and loving towards me and wants to marry me. However, i feel helpless and insecure that he may look for sex outside because i would never be able to satisfy him.
Please help,
Pratibha, 25, Delhi.
( name changed ).
Hi Pratibha,
First of all inform your father about his friend if you havent already. It isnt your fault.
I am sorry that your first experiences of this beautiful gift by god was with this beast. He used you for his sexual urges . That's not how it is supposed to be . Thats not how it is. That man didnt love you. He was violent and used you as an object.
However, the boyfriend who loves you so much and cares for you isnt a beast. He could have easily made you feel guilty about the lack of physical intimacy in your relationship but didnt.
Give it a chance. You may feel miserable and scared in the beginning. I am sure all the horror would come back in the beginning. But you need to go through this storm initially to eventually find out that you are missing out on something incredible. Tell your boyfriend about your incident . He would take extra care to be gentle and soft with you. And trust me you would feel like a woman after the beautiful intimate bonding.
Sex is a beautiful gift given by god to us. Its a beautiful way of expressing your love. It could also be meeting of two souls. Its magical when it is right.
And remember you should not have sex with the objective of receiving or delivering satisfaction. Its about expressing love and enjoying and celebrating each other. Keep it light hearted, have fun, be a tease, do roleplays...dont be in a rush. Dont anaylze yours or his performance. It would automatically be great. And it will not be great sometimes. It okay. It should not be great every time. It creates more excitement tway.hat
Dont let that animal be present in your life even when he is not around. Dont give him the powers to dictate your life. He overpowered you for two months but dont give him this power for lifetime.
I repeat please inform your boyfriend about your problem. Tell him to contact me at the new email id mentioned in the first introductory post.
You are beautiful and deserve to be loved,
Regards,
Guru.
I am 25 year old woman living in Delhi. I have been raped by my dads friend over and over for almost two months when i was 15 while staying at his house during vacations.
Now i have a boyfriend for the last 6 months and i cannot get intimate with him. The very idea of a man touching me makes me anxious. I am scared that i might never enjoy physical relationships ever in my life again because of that beast. How do i tell this to my boyfriend. He never has forced me till date and is very caring and loving towards me and wants to marry me. However, i feel helpless and insecure that he may look for sex outside because i would never be able to satisfy him.
Please help,
Pratibha, 25, Delhi.
( name changed ).
Hi Pratibha,
First of all inform your father about his friend if you havent already. It isnt your fault.
I am sorry that your first experiences of this beautiful gift by god was with this beast. He used you for his sexual urges . That's not how it is supposed to be . Thats not how it is. That man didnt love you. He was violent and used you as an object.
However, the boyfriend who loves you so much and cares for you isnt a beast. He could have easily made you feel guilty about the lack of physical intimacy in your relationship but didnt.
Give it a chance. You may feel miserable and scared in the beginning. I am sure all the horror would come back in the beginning. But you need to go through this storm initially to eventually find out that you are missing out on something incredible. Tell your boyfriend about your incident . He would take extra care to be gentle and soft with you. And trust me you would feel like a woman after the beautiful intimate bonding.
Sex is a beautiful gift given by god to us. Its a beautiful way of expressing your love. It could also be meeting of two souls. Its magical when it is right.
And remember you should not have sex with the objective of receiving or delivering satisfaction. Its about expressing love and enjoying and celebrating each other. Keep it light hearted, have fun, be a tease, do roleplays...dont be in a rush. Dont anaylze yours or his performance. It would automatically be great. And it will not be great sometimes. It okay. It should not be great every time. It creates more excitement tway.hat
Dont let that animal be present in your life even when he is not around. Dont give him the powers to dictate your life. He overpowered you for two months but dont give him this power for lifetime.
I repeat please inform your boyfriend about your problem. Tell him to contact me at the new email id mentioned in the first introductory post.
You are beautiful and deserve to be loved,
Regards,
Guru.
No comments:
Post a Comment